Journey

I wrote out what my biggest limited negative belief was, to see if I could get to the core or root of the problem or lesson, bring it all up to the surface to be “dealt with”.. to really look into why I struggle to become free and figure out this game.

From it, I got insights about how “all” of our negative, limited beliefs are running and ruining our lives. Sabotaging or serve our lives.

So I think I will share my own story about why I still smoke and then share my intended solution for turning around all of the self-sabotaging habits that I am running on auto-pilot throughout my life. Share how we can wield our mind on a conscious, subconscious and spiritual level to learn, grow and be all we are meant to be.

We have 60,000 or more thoughts running through our head a day. They are running a programme based on our repeated beliefs, habits, and thoughts from yesterday. Most of those thoughts are not new. We have just programmed them in by repeating them. These thoughts help us direct our lives without having to think about breathing or how to walk or how to digest our food into nutrients and so on. If we are aware that most of our thoughts are running on autopilot and directing our lives, and that most of our thoughts that we have daily are the same as we had yesterday, we can use that awareness to be more mindful about starting to create better thoughts that direct our lives in a better way.

One example is that I was running a negative mindset my entire life, but I did learn how to turn it around so that I’m running a positive mindset almost 99% of the time, constantly using negative thoughts as a popup blocker: a judgement, fear, anxiety or some kind of discomfort comes up, and I have already trained my brain over the past several years to find the positive about it.

But I still have other negative, limited beliefs that I haven’t spent time on turning around, in fact, I turned them around to be positive in a way that doesn’t serve my full potential, but it served me at the time, to be able to cure myself and remove the fear. But now I want to turn that around even further – adjust the belief even further, by removing it from my life because it is one of the big things that I haven’t yet overcome, that still causes issues in my life in dealings with other people, in dealings with not being able to afford it, in dealings with how I am treating my body, in dealings with thoughts and beliefs that it is creating in me that is affecting my life in a negative way… and it’s time to deal.

So today, I’m going to get serious and really look at this belief from all angles, and I hope that by me sharing what limited beliefs come up and the thoughts that are directing my life, that it helps you also see habits and limited beliefs in your own life, to see how we create and magnify these thoughts and beliefs, and what we can all do to turn it around to serve our lives.

My biggest negative limited belief is smoking. I want to see if I can get to the core of why I still struggle to become free and figure out this game. Hopefully the answers come and I can free myself of this big burden that holds me back in so many ways.

One excellent marketing trick with cigarettes, is in their strict “must be sold by the packet”. They know that if you could buy one smoke at a time, that you only feel the need to buy one every other week and that the feeling will dissipate before you went somewhere to buy it, but that by selling them strictly by the packet, you have them on-hand at all times so you can reach for it and grab it whenever you get anxious, stressed, think about it, and so you integrate them into your life as an automatic “reach” and develop the automatic habit of reaching, the neural pathways are formed where you relate certain circumstances to reach to smoke a cigarette.

It’s not the cigarette itself that relaxes you out of your stress in the first place. It’s first maybe peer pressure, curiosity, as a way to subconsciously express your anti conformity of “what is wrong with the world” or “stop telling me what to do”, an acceptance into your tribe when you are younger… positive reinforcement of negative behaviour. The being told what to do, when to do it, the being suppressed.. oppressed things that you feel but are not consciously aware of until much later in life, but it’s there. Smoking as a way to feel in control. Before you are even aware that this is your way of taking back control over your life, the trap is controlling you too.
We continue this habit of reaching automatically whenever we want to express that ‘control’, but your body is so cool, it learns to integrate it into autopilot mode for you, just as we don’t need to consciously think about how to walk, eat, move, breathe, digest, the automatic routine we do when we first wake each day, etc.

The Auto-habit of reaching whenever you feel certain things that remind the body “oh, that’s when we smoke”
Feeling anxious, stressed, fearful, nervous, less-than, limited? Reach for a smoke. And you go through your ritual. You light up, your breathing slows down, your mind gets the illusion that all is well and calm. It’s kind of a time-out from whatever you have to deal with and also because your subconscious initially got the message that it’s supporting and helping you in some way, it’s doing what you want it to do, and that act has been reinforced over and over and over again, day after day, hour after hour.

You add the ritual to more and more areas of your life, to reinforce your freedom to do whatever you want, to have control over your own decisions, for relaxation, anti-conformity, rebelling against other people telling you what to do and who to be.

You make it part of your identity and daily ritual.

The price goes up and up and your mind says “I can’t afford to smoke” but your subconscious makes the cigarettes even more valuable to you. More “needed”. More of a “need” to have. More of a.. I need to have this control over my life.

The packets have warnings which only serve to drive your fear .. and what have you taught yourself to do when you feel fear?

Go into auto-pilot, fight or flight mode.

What is your crutch in those situations? Your auto-response that you have taught with your ritual? What’s your automatic go-to that you always have on hand and have programmed into yourself day after day, year after year to go to when you have fear, stress, discomfort, relaxation. All of that.

When you do the same thing over and over and over again, the brain forms grooves. Neural pathways that form your programming so that you don’t have to relearn what to do when you feel limited or relaxed or whatever program you are running throughout the day.

You have programmed your body to help you. Your subconscious is trying to help you. It thinks it’s serving you because that’s what you have programmed it to do.

But what happens when you realize that its not actually helping you? That the auto programming is self-sabotage?

You realize what’s going on, you know consciously that the smoking is harming your health, and is keeping you ostracised from society, that it stinks, that it makes everything you own stink, that you are less attractive, that you bring more fear into your life from other people’s fears and judgements and your own fears and judgements, and your cells are screaming no! 

But your body is trying to help you. You still have the inner programming, the autopilot crutch. The habit of reaching in all of these situations.
It’s as real and as true for your body as automatically breathing and digesting food, as walking and talking. AND, your body is used to having a certain feeling.. that it believes is trying to help you, so it tries to bring these things into you to recreate that same experience that it thinks is helping you. You have a belief that it is helping you, a program that runs that actually does “help you”. The intention behind the act actually does help you. So even though consciously, logically, rationally you know that it is harming you in so many ways, the ‘act’ itself is helping you.

Some people quit smoking only to switch to junk food, alcohol, soda, chocolate, or any other number of self-sabotage routines because they are so similar in nature. That something “unhelpful” is helping. If you want to change this program to serve you, heal yourself, and become all you are meant to be, you need to realize you are an Infinite Being having a human experience and make this game work for you.

Since you have the awesome ability of creating new neural pathways that serve your life and help your future self and only needs to be redirected / reprogrammed and then repeated often enough that the new grooves form/create over the top of the unserving grooves. You need new grooves. You can create new neural pathways.

It can be as easy or as hard as what you want it to be.
We are unlimited infinite beings with inner-limitations to conquer.

Because we have been unaware of this game, we also had to programme ignorance into our self-defeating habits. Illogical excuses, reasons and head-in-the-sand beliefs to continue to smoke or how any addiction that is sabotaging us. To re-wire our logic, to explain how it helps us (because it does, because we programmed it that way). We don’t know / understand how it’s helping us on a conscious level, it’s just that feeling that it does.

Logically we know that it’s stupid to smoke. There are no benefits in either the physical or unphysical realm of smoking. Just those grooves that you have developed that is “helping you” not have to think. Just that intention you created to help you feel more in control of your life, just that unexplainable feeling that it is serving us, and that automatic program that keeps it running on auto-pilot.

There is a conflict. Inside, part of you knows it is helping you. But logically you know it’s not.
But that which has the most reinforcement, is the program we run. That which is the most repeated and familiar and automatic, is the program we run.

So how do you reprogramme that very strong, very real, very true, self-sabotaging belief when some unconscious part of you is doing it to help you.

You need to create a new program. Create neurons that serve you.

Removing our negative beliefs and limitations is why we are here, is one of the things we are here to experience. Conquering adversities. Developing our soul.

We need to work through the limited beliefs that are coming up for us.
All feelings of being “less than” what we are capable of.
All beliefs that are not serving us needs to be reprogrammed.

We need to play the game. Get to the next level. Defeat the negative.

We need to love ourselves more and love this game.
Become a super hero.
And use what learn to help others.

Many others have shared how they conquered their adversities and you will resonate with some and not others. Other people sharing their experience will help you reprogram your beliefs.

When I first gave up smoking years ago, it was a combination of the September 11 attacks and reading a book by Allan Carr in that same week, that helped me quit for almost 8 years without suffering at all.

My soul got jolted out of its coma. I was reminded about how precious life is and I felt ridiculous smoking and I let it go.
And Allan’s book helped me realize what a scam smoking is, and gave me the tools at the time to defeat it with ease.

8 years I was free of the trap. And I’ve felt full of shame and guilt when I started smoking again.

I’ve tried 50 different ways at least. Spent a fortune. Bought so many books, audios, dvd’s, went to hypnotists, tried Champix and patches, and even did my own course on hypnotherapy because it wasn’t working on me so I thought Id learn how to do it myself. I’ve read every single one of Allan Carr’s books since then too – including the one that helped me the first time, maybe 100 times throughout the years, trying to get back that magic. Trying to become superman again. It’s ridiculous what I’ve tried and failed with over the years.

So I built a new program… “I can’t Quit”. and “I’m a failure”… “I always fail”.. more negative beliefs were formed.

Hmmm. So this is what I’m working with here.

Beliefs of “not good enough”, not “pretty enough”, unlovable, failure, rejected, wanting to be liked, being accepted by the tribe..
and all those beliefs also have triggers and stories to deal with.

In addition, I have beliefs that I’ve taken on “since” having to train my brain to be ignorant of that which I didn’t want to admit or deal with.
My body suppressing these memories to protect me, and new thought forms, beliefs and neural pathways and grooves have been formed.
What my auto programming has deemed “the positive beliefs” that I got out earlier. The automatic reach whenever I’ve felt limited or less than.

The automatic reach when I wanted to take time-out.
The automatic reach when I’m on the phone or sitting at the computer.
The automatic reach when I’m outside
The automatic reach when I’m creating anything
The automatic reach when I’m sad
The automatic reach when I’m happy
The automatic reach when I’ve been drinking coffee or alcohol
The automatic reach after I’ve had a meal
The automatic reach after I’ve accomplished something
The automatic reach when I’m on breaks at work
The automatic reach when .. every aspect of my life.. all of that

I feared getting emphysema and I even manifested that into my life too.

Then I conquered emphysema, which was my biggest health challenge to date, but I still couldn’t quit smoking. In fact, I even added new beliefs to keep me smoking. That it kept my ego in check.. I didn’t become a know-it-all annoying health person (cos I did become that when I got into natural healing and healed myself), and that I was more understanding and compassionate because of it. That I could help other emphysema sufferers that also couldn’t quit, still get their health back. I programmed a belief that I had no fear of smoking and that it wasn’t harming me, and I got better.

Through changing my beliefs, removing my fear and taking positive steps and having intention to heal. I believed I was going to cure myself and then took the steps that I could take, the baby steps that made a difference.

But recently I’ve been getting a new message to quit. It’s been in there the whole time but my ego kept re-programming and suppressing those thoughts.

I’ve wanted to figure out how to quit just as easily as I did it the first time, but this time, I wanted it to be lasting – permanent so that not only could I help myself, but all those that I’ve been helping with emphysema.

Two weeks ago I took the first step to quitting smoking. I had another hypnosis session. This time with a friend who I trusted and who I felt would really be able to get to the core. 3 hours into the session, she realized that I had a lot bigger issues than smoking.
We did another session last week and discovered that my definition of love was a little flawed. I released a lot in that session. A lifetime of feeling unloved, unworthy, and not good enough was released in that session just by reprogramming my definition of love.

And today, writing this, is to find out what other limited beliefs are in there that I need to release and let go of, to conquer this. Getting all of this out in order to try and find a way out.

It’s not just hypnosis that will help. But that definitely helps get the ball rolling. And I’m now a big believer in the benefits of hypnosis. I always thought that I couldn’t be hypnotized because I don’t actually see anything when I visualize. Just blackness (so I couldn’t “walk down the garden path” or see things that they wanted me to see). I don’t feel hypnotized and so most hypnotherapists get frustrated with me that what they had been taught, doesn’t seem to work on me. And my people pleasing habit added more guilt into the mix, because I didn’t want people to be frustrated with me, I didn’t want to waste their time, and I didn’t want them to feel like a failure. But she calmed my fears about that and was very patient with me and I finally opened myself up to her and was able to release so much.

The barriers are coming down. Things are starting to come up that I need to deal with. I’m becoming aware of that which is holding me back and where I need to love myself more.

Hypnosis is definitely a tool I intend to use more and more to remove limited beliefs and help reprogramme my mind to serve me instead of sabotage me.

Where I express my “truth” are tools that serve me. My videos, blog, private facebook groups, closest friends, etc. It helps me get stuff out to deal with and get clarity on what my next step is to help identify and remove my limited beliefs.

I’m also starting to write every morning. Getting my thoughts out upon waking. And today, what came out is this blog post – all my smoking shit. So that’s my next focus of awareness. Conquering this. Becoming free of this. And sharing my how’s with you, so that if there is anything that helps me, it might resonate with you too.

I need to develop healthy habits and replace and override my negative habits.
I need to become more aware of my triggers and auto-pilot programming and start reprogramming and reforming neurons.

• Affirmations
• Visualization
• Walking
• Loving myself more
• Remembering that we are infinite beings having a human experience

Overcoming small challenges by developing small habits to program myself that I’m not a failure and have a more “I can do this” attitude instead of seeing it as completely impossible. I know that if I do this – I can do anything that is holding me back in so many ways.

It’s now the everyday reminder / reinforcement that I’m a failure and can’t overcome challenges and limited beliefs.. and at the same time, it’s reinforcing my control over my own life, my freedom to do whatever I want, and it’s my reinforcement for being “less than” my potential.. and its got all those 100’s of reinforced beliefs that I have taken on.

• I’m going to re-read that damn Allan Carr book again.
• Create healthy habits, a new morning routine, a new daily ritual.
• I’m going to disrupt the automatic habits, change them so that the situations are breaking up – go left when I would automatically go right kinda thing.
• Create new neural pathways and disrupt the existing ones.
• Become mindful and conscious of when I’m automatically lighting up
• Find an affirmation that serves me and set it up in Google calender to automatically SMS remind me throughout the day.
• Spend 30 minutes a day visualizing myself being free of smoking and what that will mean for my life.
• Write down all the benefits I will gain by being free and have it near me and easily accessible to read daily.
• I’m going to add them to the Google Calender too.
• I’m going to do something daily for myself that incorporates that new “free” me, that only that free person can experience, that develops more self-love.
• More hypnosis on things that come up.
• Create a self-hypnosis of the things that benefit me and remind me of my potential.
• Drink less coffee and more water.
• Create pop-up blockers for urges to smoke.
• Start cleaning everything I own and not allowing myself to re-infect it with the smell of smoke.
• Next to each benefit I will gain.. I will list what I will be able to enjoy and experiences I’ll be able to have because of that new benefit.
  Basically a total program rewrite.
• And I will update you with what helps me best.

We all want a quick fix, one pill, one session solution to our limitations. I do too. I want the easy way.

And even though my methods kinda sound like hard work, the only hard thing about it is starting. The rest looks easy enough.

It’s just really being more mindful and bringing to mind what I really want. And knowing that this is rewriting a positive script for my subconscious to follow that will serve me in every area of my life.

• Benefits of Quitting:
• How else can I accomplish this?
• What else can I do to reinforce this?
• Smell good, taste good, brush teeth after
• Lungs happy
• Memory will improve
• Brain function will improve
• Whole body will improve
• I will feel like exercising
• Slavery to the cigarette corporations
• Money
• Slavery to my own self-sabotage

That hypnosis session has definitely started me on the path of loving myself more, of wanting to take care of myself, of wanting to become the best I can be.

And that’s the practical stuff and logical stuff out of the way.

Now lets delve into the crazy stuff.

Everything is energy. We are energy. The illusion is energy. The physical things we experience is just energy vibrating on a certain frequency. So what can I use about this information to help me manifest what I want in regards to releasing negative beliefs and creating the life I want?

Realizing that anything is possible. Everything is possible.
And all that which we have manifested into our lives is here to help us grow, evolve, experience, create and become all we are meant to be.
To evolve our soul. To experience.

What is this teaching me? How is this helping me? And what can I do?

My way of reprogramming addictions and negative beliefs

Stepping into a parallel reality where I don’t smoke and where I’m achieving everything I want.
What does that look like?
How does it feel?
What ‘good’ habits do I have instead?
What does a non-smoker feel like?
What does freedom from slavery feel like?

Remembering the power of our words and thoughts. That our words & thoughts are energy. That our thoughts and words bring things into our creation. I have created this to conquer it. It’s my mountain to climb. It’s my superhero journey. Its my obstacle to overcome and learn from. I manifested this into my life to create adversity to overcome. I am writing this story to have a happy ending. I choose the pages in my story. I choose the adventure. I create the ending. This chapter is my experience of being able to achieve anything I want to achieve. To release limitations and things that hold me back. One paragraph at a time.

Speaking these words makes me accountable and sharing my vulnerabilities makes me determined not to have any.

To create the reality that I want to experience, I just need to play the game through all the levels.

This level is a challenging one for me, but it will not beat me.

I am an Infinite Being having a human experience and this is a small stepping stone with big impact that will shape the rest of my journey and create the next level of the game.

To manifest health, healthy cells, healthy mind, healthy lungs
I need to just vibrate health, think health, speak health, BE health. Project out the frequency / tap into the frequency of health. Intend and know already. “LIVE”.. “BE” HEALTH and all that it encumbers.

To manifest unlimited, I need to just be unlimited, think unlimited, speak unlimited, BE unlimited
Project out the frequency/ tap into the frequency of unlimited.
Intend and know already live / BE unlimited and all that encumbers.

Believe, know, step into, become, BE, embrace, live, create, have faith and trust that is what I already am and just STEP INTO IT.

Vibrate high, radiate and enlargen the energy. LIVE that energy. BE that energy.

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