Notes from the book The Power of your Sub-Conscious Mind by Joseph Murphy PhD related to Relationships with other people.
Dealing with Difficult People
A hateful or resentful thought is a mental poison. Do not think ill of another for to do so is to think ill of yourself. You are the only thinker in your universe, and your thoughts are creative.
Your mind is a creative medium; therefore, what you think and feel about the other, you are bringing to pass in your own experience. Wish for the other what you wish for yourself. This is the key to harmonious human relations.
To cheat, rob, or defraud another brings lack, loss, and limitation to yourself. Your subconscious mind records your inner motivations, thoughts, and feelings. These being of a negative nature; loss, limitation, and trouble come to you in countless ways. Actually, what you do to the other, you are doing to yourself.
Become emotionally mature and permit other people to differ from you. They have a perfect right to disagree with you, and you have the same freedom to disagree with them. You can disagree without being disagreeable.
Love is the answer to getting along with others.
You would not hate a hunchback or cripple. You would have compassion. Have compassion and understanding for mental hunchbacks who have been conditioned negatively. To understand all is to forgive all.
All you owe any person in the world is love, and love is wishing for everyone what you wish for yourself—health, happiness, and all the blessings of life.
The other person cannot annoy you or irritate you except if you permit him. The only way he can annoy you is through your own thought. The more love and good will you emanate and exude, the more comes back to you. If you puncture the other fellow’s ego and wound his estimate of himself, you cannot gain his good will.
Recognize that every man wants to be loved and appreciated, and made to feel important in the world. Realize that the other man is conscious of his true worth, and that, like yourself, he feels the dignity of being an expression of the One Life Principle animating all men. As you do this consciously and knowingly, you build the other person up, and he returns your love and good will.
Do not permit people to take advantage of you and gain their point by temper tantrums, crying jags, or so-called heart attacks. These people are dictators who try to enslave you and make you do their bidding. Be firm but kind, and refuse to yield. Appeasement never wins. Refuse to contribute to their delinquency, selfishness, and possessiveness.
Remember, do that which is right. You are here to fulfill your ideal and remain true to the eternal verities and spiritual values of life, which are eternal. Give no one in all the world the power to deflect you from your goal, your aim in life, which is to express your hidden talents to the world, to serve humanity, and to reveal more and more of God’s wisdom, truth, and beauty to all people in the world.
Attract the right mate
You attract the right mate by dwelling on the qualities and characteristics you admire in a woman or a man, and then your subconscious mind will bring you together in divine order.
You must build into your mentality the mental equivalent of what you want in a marriage partner. If you want to attract an honest, sincere, and loving partner in life, you must be honest, sincere, and loving yourself.
When you really believe you can have the type man or woman you idealize, it is done unto you, as you believe. To believe is to accept something as true. Accept your ideal companion now mentally.
Marital & Couples
Radiate love, peace, and good will to each other. These vibrations are picked up by the subconscious mind resulting in mutual trust, affection, and respect.
A great mistake is to discuss your marital problems or difficulties with neighbors, friends or relatives. Keep your quarrels to yourself. Refrain from criticism and condemnation of your partner. As you think and feel, so are you. In marital problems, always seek expert advice. You would not go to a carpenter to pull a tooth; neither should you discuss your marriage problems with relatives or friends. You should go to a trained person for counsel.
Your subconscious mind is a recording machine, which reproduces your habitual thinking. Think good of the other, and you are actually thinking good about yourself.
Mentally picture your wife as she ought to be, joyous, happy, healthy, and beautiful. See your husband, as he ought to be, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious, and kind. Maintain this mental picture, and you will experience the marriage made in heaven, which is harmony and peace.
The first step: Never carry over from one day to another accumulated irritations arising from little disappointments. Be sure to forgive each other for any sharpness before you retire at night. The moment you awaken in the morning, claimintelligence is guiding you in all your ways. Send out loving thoughts of peace, harmony, and love to your marriage partner, to all members of the family, and to the whole world.
The second step: Gratitude/Say grace at breakfast. Give thanks for the wonderful food, for your abundance, and for all your blessings. Make sure that no problems, worries, or arguments shall enter into the table conversation; the same applies at dinnertime. Say to your wife or husband, “I appreciate all you are doing, and I radiate love and good will to you all day long.”
The third step: The husband and wife should alternate in praying/giving gratitude/affirmations each night. Do not take your marriage partner for granted. Show your appreciation and love. Think appreciation and good will, rather than condemnation, criticism, and nagging. The way to build a peaceful home and a happy marriage is to use a foundation of love, beauty, harmony, mutual respect, faith, and all things good.
See also Other Notes from this great book:-
- The Power of your Subconscious Mind
- The Power of your Subconscious Mind – Health
- The Power of your Subconscious Mind – Wealth & Success
- The Power of your Subconscious Mind – Addictions
- The Power of your Subconscious Mind – Conflict, Decisions
- The Power of your Subconscious Mind – People & Relationships